Work- Dance- Flow

 Working lately towards the end of the day generally I' ve felt looser. Yesterday, it being a Friday, and me having' Benny and the Jets' on my tongue as I worked alone, quite near the end of the day and really alone, I took to dancing my work and singing in imitation of Elton high and deep tones which make the song so original and enjoyable, eccentric. Of late I have had lots of breakthroughs of energy opening up through my groin area, hips and flowing more readily into my legs from the upper body. My knees can take lots of this too as it flows through to the feet. I felt in this dance how by just swaying my hips how it got that energy fowing from head over side of hips all the way down to my feet. Afterwards I felt while walking and biking home, walking in the house how my steps were creating energy from the motion of my legs. I thought of how dull and dreary work often seems but how I had made it enjoyable, ecstatic. Waking in the night I noticed that this strong flow from the top of my head had continued to my legs and saw upon getting up how my movements were more controlled, ballerina like. Why is Shiva portrayed as dancing? The permanent energy fow. He creates by this flow constant new energy, is never tired, always blissful. So my meditation, which is less a mental practice and more one of energy observation, perhaps visualization, has intensified the depth of current through muscles, nerves, spine and is making its way into my routine. I wonder often about the point of spirituality. Like in any career area, great writers, scientists, etc. are placed before us as ultimate role models to emulate. Einstein, Mozart, Shakespeare are similar in this sense to Ramana Maharshi and others for the spiritually minded. But we all know that every one of us is unique, has a unique path born out of our parentage, upbriniging, culture, personality and that therefore what worked for one sage or master may not work for us and our ultimate enlightenment or whatever end goal we might attain could only be from us. So joining a group or following a guru or religious doctrine too strictly in the end frustrates as we have to make own decisions branching off on our own paths. Any artist, author, scientist has to develop their own style after learning from the masters. This must be similar. Our bodies, souls are the canvas. Eventually the peak is reached, the mountaintop, by some, but each in his or her own way. I suppose even that ultimate experience may vary from person to person and be colored by our humanity. This is why there are many religions which filter those experiences down to the masses, trying to copy superficially the exact movements of that one person. I know little about these various mystical schools in the main religions besides my yoga and tai chi training but presume that they also provide a similar path( I have a book on sufi techniques for example). Moral precepts are relatively universal but hard to maintain. We need deeper reasons to love and not hate, to not be jealous, irritable, angry, suspicious, bitter, ashamed. We have to feel alive now. To me it seems that it is a fine balance. As my energy increases it breaks through barriers in nerves and muscles and becomes more continuous, going from surges annually, seasonally, monthly weekly, daily, hourly, continually and that these changes bring with them resistance levels which feel like all of those negative emotions but heightened and cleansed by following bliss as the flow gets more continual, less jerky, more smoothed out. So it is like learning to drink sociably in a responsible manner, just enough to loosen up without getting drunk and angry, irresponsible. Once you get used to a drug, you need more the next time to acheive the same effect. Kundalini flow is similar but to an ultimate fuller health. Kundalini awakening stories sound like madness but ultimately end, in best cases in extremely positive results. I hit lots of speed bumps but feel it is welll worth the while to continue on my path as it seems to be getting easier as the body works for me through habit. Like one who has practised on an instrument for years many hours per day, new creative ideas come as inspirations from one' s depths and primal moods absorbed from one' s surroundings. Gradually I hope to become less disturbed, perturbed, more holy but I guess the good feelings alternate with the bad for the technical energetic reasons cited above. I was meditating for example and my visual field was quite blue. I thought that the pineal gland, basically crystal in center of brain attached to third eye center, was being cleansed. Our gland centers correspond to chakras. Charging, cleansing them has an effect. Spiritual technique is science or sport with body as subject.