I have been struggling with this vis-a- vis romance and God. Is God arbitrary, mran even, expecting submission to dictates of a cold universe or is surrender positive? Since kundalini awakening energy has increased in my body. This means I am less matter and more spirit. More percent of me is free roaming, unpredictable, uncontrollable. I have to therefore trust God proportionally more than when I was a cold, emotionless materialist, This is similar to romantic surrender where one gives oneself up to the other and relies on intuitiin and feeling not routine, structure. The deeper God or a person's energies penetrate me, the more my sense of control or ego is destroyed. Mysticism and romance are quite similar.
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