THE ROLE OF CELIBACY IN THE SPIRITUAL LIFE

https://www.dlshq.org/download/the-role-of-celibacy-in-the-spiritual-life/ 

As my kids are grown and I tread a spiritual path, the third phase of voluntary brahmacharya is mine. Before marriage I was quite celibate as well. This is more traditional than the modern concept of dating followed up by cohabitation with a series of partners until one finds perhaps the right one to marry or have children with.Each relationship in teens to 20s could last each time somewhat longer. One learns, like in the job market, sports, etc various pitfalls, strengths of your own personality, how to handle a person' s emotional, physical needs so that a final serious partnership, settling down, is not a catastrophe. This western model is a bit looser than the traditional marriage model without premarital sex but essentially a celibacy phase is expected up to at least mid to late teens and for more educated perhaps into college years as one needs great focus. I recall reading a book about the life of Theresa of Avila, a spiritual giant in Spain several hundred years ago. Her young nuns had a strict condition. Often young men, acquaintances, came wanting to visit and were turned asay by her. She knew that one glance at him would destroy their focus, devotion on God, Jesus. In those days too many births, a growing population was unwelcome as agriculture was the economic basis so military or religious duties for offspring helped compensate a lack of opportunity. In modern life buddhist monks and nuns and Catholic celibates are still accepted. It is however wise to see how serious one' s spiritual path is before considering such a step. I was quite cynical about religion but developed spirituality in parallel to family life. Kundalini awakened in a slow fashion over time but quicker after 50 with life changes. This might be karmic as some horoscope transits seemed activated. At any rate I satiated my sexual urges, curiosity, my family desires and could then deepen my spiritual practice. Perhaps if one is spiritual at a younger age celibacy might be more readily accepted or desire for family and sexuality could be put off until later than the usual teens, early to mid twenties dating routine. Some people live for platonic friendship groups and pets, nature, various hobbies. Nowadays starting a family is expensive, difficult so that alternative lifestyle choices are much approved in society in general.